Fake Eyelashes On A Ten-Year-Old. Yum.

what shall I rant about today?

Ah! Living vicariously through your kids is always a favorite subject of mine. :)

I'll start with the show Toddlers In Tiaras on TLC. If you haven't seen the show, its basically a beauty pageant for ten-year-olds and younger. Which means the kids get to wear dresses more expensive than my prom dress, fake eyelashes the most professional of drag queens would be jealous of, and fake teeth by great aunt would have killed to have shoved in her mouth. Yes friends, these girls wear fake teeth. Because their baby teeth aren't the epitome of sexiness for a ten year old. Yummy.

But thats not even the worst part. The moms on that show make me cringe. I'm not saying that every pageant mom is as bad as the ones on this show are, because lets face it, its a reality show. Which means its about as far from reality as it gets. But these women... yikes. They are the perfect example of someone living vicariously through their child. Most of the mothers were once, or once tried to be a pageant girl, which already makes for a psycho-mom persona. They practically force their daughters to shake their asses like a twenty-one-year-old at the club, which almost induces vomiting. They want their daughter to win, like any parent would, but they just seem to take it a wee bit too far.

I know, I know. I'm sure in however many years, when I pop out a baby Alex, I'm going to want her to do some cute thing that none of the other babies can do... blah blah blah. But really, with the spray on tans, fake teeth, huge hair, and skimpy sparkly dresses, these poor girls are just trying to be trophy wives. Bleh.

And why, you may ask, am I so passionate about my hatred of this phenomena? Well lovelies, I have personally encountered the ever so unfortunate "dance moms" associated with competitive dance. Yes, that was once me. No fake teeth (ew), but I did rock some fabulously overdone makeup and costumes my dad was embarrassed of. Now mind you, I loved what I did, even though I wasn't the best. Thats probably why I enjoyed it so much, now that I think about it. My mom and dad were always at my competitions, but to me, they didn't take it too far, by any means. Especially when there were other moms, even at my studio, that practically shat themselves if their daughter's hair wasn't perfect, or their makeup wasn't dark enough.

So here's my solution: chill your shit people.

Its not the end of the world, its just the parent's last chance to make their personal dreams come true. Let the kids decide what they want to do, and hey, theres a ninety percent chance that they'll want to do what the parents did.

And again, I would love to hear your ideas :D